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Books : Divorce and Splitting Up (Which Essential Guides) (Which Essential Guides) .
Rating: 
- Not exactly reality
I suppose this is a good read for those who want a textbook version of reality, but this book aint reality. Im going through a messy divorce as I type and what the book doesnt tell you is how bl**dy slow the whole process is, and the fact that legal aid solicitors take their time and barely do anything for you (forget trying to get any court order or speedy reply or appointment, this is the NHS of law), and how the system screws women who leave abusive men from just about every angle.
I have been to citizens advice bureau, who wasted my time, twice (and it took ages to get through), I have been through 3 solicitors because the first two gave me reckless advice more concerned with costs than helping me with my case, our first mediator was biased in favour of my ex and she mispresented a session to my solicitor deliberately, the list goes on.
Point being, yeah, its a guide, like a guide to childbirth. but the true horror and the knowledge of what divorce with a bitter ex is really like can only be known by going through it.
Domestic abuse? even the police turned on me when I asked them for help.
CSA? they work as slowly as solicitors.
On benefit? Expect to be grilled every turn and its a full time job just keeping your benefit coming in.
Expect to get an injunction if youre on legal aid? not a chance.
oh and the final screw to you - as long as you have an 'interest' in the marital home, you dont qualify for council housing or home share schemes, and selling the marital home can take years so I hope you're happy paying rent.
if you havent left your partner yet, think about it very carefully. my case i am glad i left, but be ready for the s**t to hit the fan and feel totally and utterly without support or rights because that is what the book dont tell u but it is what i am telling you and it is reality.
bw
Rating:
- Useful
A very clear and simple path through some of the legal stuff in divorce. I read this together with FAMILY COURT HELL by Mark Harris. FAMILY COURT HELL is a story of Britain's Worst Access Case ever, which explicitly details how bad child access cases can become if mother does not want to co operate. By reading both, a [slightly!] clearer picture emerges as to what not to do! Buy both if you can.
- Not exactly realityI suppose this is a good read for those who want a textbook version of reality, but this book aint reality. Im going through a messy divorce as I type and what the book doesnt tell you is how bl**dy slow the whole process is, and the fact that legal aid solicitors take their time and barely do anything for you (forget trying to get any court order or speedy reply or appointment, this is the NHS of law), and how the system screws women who leave abusive men from just about every angle.
I have been to citizens advice bureau, who wasted my time, twice (and it took ages to get through), I have been through 3 solicitors because the first two gave me reckless advice more concerned with costs than helping me with my case, our first mediator was biased in favour of my ex and she mispresented a session to my solicitor deliberately, the list goes on.
Point being, yeah, its a guide, like a guide to childbirth. but the true horror and the knowledge of what divorce with a bitter ex is really like can only be known by going through it.
Domestic abuse? even the police turned on me when I asked them for help.
CSA? they work as slowly as solicitors.
On benefit? Expect to be grilled every turn and its a full time job just keeping your benefit coming in.
Expect to get an injunction if youre on legal aid? not a chance.
oh and the final screw to you - as long as you have an 'interest' in the marital home, you dont qualify for council housing or home share schemes, and selling the marital home can take years so I hope you're happy paying rent.
if you havent left your partner yet, think about it very carefully. my case i am glad i left, but be ready for the s**t to hit the fan and feel totally and utterly without support or rights because that is what the book dont tell u but it is what i am telling you and it is reality.
bw
Rating:
- UsefulA very clear and simple path through some of the legal stuff in divorce. I read this together with FAMILY COURT HELL by Mark Harris. FAMILY COURT HELL is a story of Britain's Worst Access Case ever, which explicitly details how bad child access cases can become if mother does not want to co operate. By reading both, a [slightly!] clearer picture emerges as to what not to do! Buy both if you can.
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